I'm going to be honest here, I love to tailgate.
Seriously.
I love it.
That being said, I'm not sure everybody can handle a solid 7 hours in the parking lot throwing back adult beverages and eating hot dogs wrapped in bacon then dipped in cheese.
The WashingtonPost ran a wire story about the Meadowlands complex cutting back on tailgate time. They are going from 7 to 5 hours. (Let's be honest now...you can really accomplish a lot in 5 hours. I have a hard time believing that the number of tailgaters showing up 7 hours early for a 1pm kickoff was anywhere near what we might describe as "a lot".)
The best part of the story is a mention of how during halftime at Jets games there is a certain spot in the stadium where dudes gather and "demand that women expose their breasts". Even funnier than picturing that scene in your head is the fact that it only happens at Jets games. I guess this just goes to show you that the NFC attracts a higher class of fan. Like we didn't already know that right?
Internet radio: Wow. Talk about hit or miss. I tried to give a new station a chance today but I literally felt like the songs were interrupting the commercials. We are talking about the worst song to ad ratio in the History of Earth. So if you are looking for a good listen on this series of tubes we call the Internet, make sure you move your cursor well past "Classic Hits Radio" on iTunes. You will thank me later.
Gunners baby: Today is the first match that means something. Arsenal v FC Twente in the 3rd round of UEFA Champions League Qualifiers. We have really come along way in this country when 3rd round games are being carried on ESPN2. You see this is what ESPN is good at: showing games. I'd be less inclined to talk shit about the station if they just stuck to their strengths. Instead they are trying to conquer the world with other junk. It, of course, isn't working.
I'm not sure what to expect from the Gunners this year. Finishing in the top 4 seems like the best scenario. But just think about that goal for a second. That is so lame. Look I am selfish. I want to win everything every time out.
Happy Birthday Kary! I hope you have a great day until tonight when I dominate you, Baker, and Yvonne in mini-golf. But, yeah, have a great day until then kas ;)
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
i heart my job
You know what's annoying? I will be more than happy to provide you with the answer. Little flies floating around your office. So we have plants in our offices here at New Year Tech. In fact some people have more than one (I only have one).
Well anyway when we put more soil in the pots we used some killer stuff that, luckily enough, contained annoying-ass-fly eggs. At various moments throughout the day I feel like I'm in the movie The Karate Kid trying to catch these things with my hands. They are surprisingly elusive for such a slow moving bug. I guess its like trying to hit one of those slow knuckleballs from Tim Wakefield. I mean we have this spray that is supposed to work but it works about as well me trying to get early for work when I have company.
I totally forgot about this until today: Log...by Blammo.
Dear Facebook,
Stop suggesting that I add people as "friends" that you think I "know".
Sincerely,
Everybody that isn't on pace to end up with a feature role on Dateline's To Catch a Predator
Importance: I feel like you can measure your importance at work by your office location. We currently have 19 people working at Headquarters and 17 people have window offices.
Surprise, surprise, I am one of the 2 people w/o a window. Making matters worse is the fact that there is an OPEN window office just sitting there for the taking.
Candy Detail: Its true that I consider myself a bit of a candy connoisseur. Well we have the generic bowl of candy up front. It was down to some really old jolly ranchers and some of the worst Dum Dum lollipop flavors around - Root Beer, Chocolate, etc. In an effort to inject some some fresh candy around these here parts I felt it my duty to dump the remaining candy into the trash. I did so when nobody was looking last Friday, well after COB.
Results? We are now w/o any candy at all. But eventually it will pay off. I can feel it. I can see it now. Nerds, Skittles, and flavored tootsie rolls for everybody.
OMG I'm out of here.
Well anyway when we put more soil in the pots we used some killer stuff that, luckily enough, contained annoying-ass-fly eggs. At various moments throughout the day I feel like I'm in the movie The Karate Kid trying to catch these things with my hands. They are surprisingly elusive for such a slow moving bug. I guess its like trying to hit one of those slow knuckleballs from Tim Wakefield. I mean we have this spray that is supposed to work but it works about as well me trying to get early for work when I have company.
I totally forgot about this until today: Log...by Blammo.
Dear Facebook,
Stop suggesting that I add people as "friends" that you think I "know".
Sincerely,
Everybody that isn't on pace to end up with a feature role on Dateline's To Catch a Predator
Importance: I feel like you can measure your importance at work by your office location. We currently have 19 people working at Headquarters and 17 people have window offices.
Surprise, surprise, I am one of the 2 people w/o a window. Making matters worse is the fact that there is an OPEN window office just sitting there for the taking.
Candy Detail: Its true that I consider myself a bit of a candy connoisseur. Well we have the generic bowl of candy up front. It was down to some really old jolly ranchers and some of the worst Dum Dum lollipop flavors around - Root Beer, Chocolate, etc. In an effort to inject some some fresh candy around these here parts I felt it my duty to dump the remaining candy into the trash. I did so when nobody was looking last Friday, well after COB.
Results? We are now w/o any candy at all. But eventually it will pay off. I can feel it. I can see it now. Nerds, Skittles, and flavored tootsie rolls for everybody.
OMG I'm out of here.
Monday, August 4, 2008
hello old friends...its been way too long
Here we go again: Over the course of the last 7 days I have seen the reemergence of my teams. It started out last weekend when I finally got my fat ass down to McDonough Gym to see some Kenner League action. It's mostly to check out the Tombs. That is the team that has all of the incoming freshman along with two returning players. I liked what I saw out of the young pups. I will have a more detailed edition of this later.
Fast forward to this past weekend and it was Gunners time. Got my first look at some of the new/young Gunners - Nasri, Vela, Wilshere - among others. Of course the best sight of all was seeing Adebayor back in his #25 shirt.
Then last night we all had our first taste of Redskins v. 2008 - 2009. The skins game was cool for about 4 minutes and then I lost interest. It was great to see hear Michaels and Madden and see some of the guys that you know during the lineups. After that it was a complete crapfest that was fighting Van Wilder for my attention.
I honestly think Jason Campbell sucks the big fat one and best case scenario is 7-9. I had such high hopes for Campbell coming into the NFL but I just don't think he has "it". He seems to think too much out there for my liking. He had a really up and down college career at Auburn but seemed to have figured it out by his senior year. Like I said I was high on him because he can do so many of the difficult things well.
Guess we will find out this year. The Skins went out and got a west coast guy just for him.
Deadhead what? Yeah I have like 3 or 4 Grateful Dead songs on my iPod. The basic ones that everybody knows. Nothing fancy. Nothing out of the ordinary for an average Joe such as myself.
But something funny happened on Friday when I was looking to switch from my 80's Internet radio station on iTunes. I decided to click on classic rock. From there I, for some reason, gave this Grateful Dead station a chance.
Turns out...I love it. They only play the Dead and it's all stuff from concerts. I find it very relaxing while I'm at work. I'm guessing that it would be even cooler if I were under the influence of some drugs, but whatever my man. It works so far.
We blew it: I'm sad to say that summer league at Thoreau is over - and it didn't end well. We dug ourselves a huge hole only to see our valiant comeback attempt pushed away by the Ancient Warriors. They really carved us up offensively. I'd hate to see how many shots they had from close range. It would probably make me want to vomit and/or punch a hole in my wall . We help too much - which results in easy looks for them. We need some changes for next summer.
ok i'll be back later brah
Fast forward to this past weekend and it was Gunners time. Got my first look at some of the new/young Gunners - Nasri, Vela, Wilshere - among others. Of course the best sight of all was seeing Adebayor back in his #25 shirt.
Then last night we all had our first taste of Redskins v. 2008 - 2009. The skins game was cool for about 4 minutes and then I lost interest. It was great to see hear Michaels and Madden and see some of the guys that you know during the lineups. After that it was a complete crapfest that was fighting Van Wilder for my attention.
I honestly think Jason Campbell sucks the big fat one and best case scenario is 7-9. I had such high hopes for Campbell coming into the NFL but I just don't think he has "it". He seems to think too much out there for my liking. He had a really up and down college career at Auburn but seemed to have figured it out by his senior year. Like I said I was high on him because he can do so many of the difficult things well.
Guess we will find out this year. The Skins went out and got a west coast guy just for him.
Deadhead what? Yeah I have like 3 or 4 Grateful Dead songs on my iPod. The basic ones that everybody knows. Nothing fancy. Nothing out of the ordinary for an average Joe such as myself.
But something funny happened on Friday when I was looking to switch from my 80's Internet radio station on iTunes. I decided to click on classic rock. From there I, for some reason, gave this Grateful Dead station a chance.
Turns out...I love it. They only play the Dead and it's all stuff from concerts. I find it very relaxing while I'm at work. I'm guessing that it would be even cooler if I were under the influence of some drugs, but whatever my man. It works so far.
We blew it: I'm sad to say that summer league at Thoreau is over - and it didn't end well. We dug ourselves a huge hole only to see our valiant comeback attempt pushed away by the Ancient Warriors. They really carved us up offensively. I'd hate to see how many shots they had from close range. It would probably make me want to vomit and/or punch a hole in my wall . We help too much - which results in easy looks for them. We need some changes for next summer.
ok i'll be back later brah
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
survive and advance
That is exactly what we have to do tonight.
Survive and advance.
I'm fine with playing the Ancient Warriors again. We played them the other night and we didn't shoot, rebound, or defend in the transition very well, yet we were still in striking distance at the end.
This is our 3rd straight year playing in this league and each year our team composition has declined just a bit. This is evidenced by our record getting worse and worse. In fact this was the first year where we had what I will call a bad loss. And we had two of them.
On the flip side of that we also had our best win ever this season by knocking off One on One.
Well tonight we can forget it all and play a 40 minute game where the loser has to wait until next June to lace them up again at Thoreau. Who knows who will be back? Who knows who will be new?
Quite honestly...who freaking cares?
I like the Vets by 3.
I also like the amount of whining/complaining to be rather high. We come across the most complaining in our games against Ancient and One on One. I think both of those teams are just used to showing up and beating some garbage like VIKA or Birdie's Squad every game. They don't like to have somebody show up and make it hard to hit shots or get around screens.
Oh well.
Survive and advance.
I'm fine with playing the Ancient Warriors again. We played them the other night and we didn't shoot, rebound, or defend in the transition very well, yet we were still in striking distance at the end.
This is our 3rd straight year playing in this league and each year our team composition has declined just a bit. This is evidenced by our record getting worse and worse. In fact this was the first year where we had what I will call a bad loss. And we had two of them.
On the flip side of that we also had our best win ever this season by knocking off One on One.
Well tonight we can forget it all and play a 40 minute game where the loser has to wait until next June to lace them up again at Thoreau. Who knows who will be back? Who knows who will be new?
Quite honestly...who freaking cares?
I like the Vets by 3.
I also like the amount of whining/complaining to be rather high. We come across the most complaining in our games against Ancient and One on One. I think both of those teams are just used to showing up and beating some garbage like VIKA or Birdie's Squad every game. They don't like to have somebody show up and make it hard to hit shots or get around screens.
Oh well.
Thursday, July 24, 2008
3rd time is the charm
Well last night was the third time that I either was at RFK or had left for RFK to see United take on Houston. Since my blog has been on a huge summer vacation here is a little recap:
First try: June 4 - After 15 minutes of 0-0 game action the ref decides that the Biblical type weather in the District is enough to at least stop the game momentarily. After 90 great rain delayed minutes we are told, "Sorry folks the show is over. See ya next time". The rain delay story is best told separately.
Second try: July 22 - I am on my way to get the keg when Oscar calls me and says not to buy anything yet. "Give me 20 minutes to call you back," he says. So on a bright, sunny day in the world's most important city, we can't play soccer because somebody forgot to pay the electric bill. See you guys tomorrow!
Third and final try: July 23/July 24 - Well I'm not sure if we got it right. I mean United looked terrible in a 2-0 home loss - snapping their 6 game unbeaten streak - but that's not even the half of it. We made it 53 minutes w/o any problems. Good tailgate. Great weather. And then the skies opened. Next thing you know its pitch black at RFK. Again. This is all happening at around 830ish. Yeah the next time we see soccer it is 1145 and there are about 200 people left in the stadium.
I, of course, stayed.
I mean what was I going to do? Go home and watch some Georgetown game from the mid 90's in a lame attempt to forget how freaking old I am??? Yeah not tonight boys. Tonight I was hanging out at RFK into the early morning hours to catch some of the worst soccer of my life.
So let's dig deeper for the positives:
1. I found the team store. I spent 100 bucks. Not bad considering the fact that I could have easily dropped 1000 bucks w/o flinching.
2. I still have a phone. My phone died a horrible death at the first United - Houston match. Something about texting in a downpour. Hey Verizon why don't you plan for such events. Idiots.
3. Mike Terry. I made the big mistake of saying that I could give him a ride back to the metro. What started out as a nightmare ended with a good highlight. This guy slides through my back window onto the bed of my truck in order to secure a gatorade from my cooler. It was really awesome to watch as the driver.
4. We cleaned the Pod. The state of conditions inside the Barra Brava pod at the beginning of the tailgate were really bleak. An hour later and it was spotless thanks mostly to Connie. That guy is a relentless worker. It's like he had the whole thing planned since the time he got up.
You know what's annoying? When people go out of town. OMG it's been forever!
You know what else is annoying? When the following people fake on a mid week United game: Baker, Yvonne, Sam, Bobby.
You know what's awesome. When people go out of town but have the presence of mind to send you 6 boxes of Banana Crunch. Silly!
First try: June 4 - After 15 minutes of 0-0 game action the ref decides that the Biblical type weather in the District is enough to at least stop the game momentarily. After 90 great rain delayed minutes we are told, "Sorry folks the show is over. See ya next time". The rain delay story is best told separately.
Second try: July 22 - I am on my way to get the keg when Oscar calls me and says not to buy anything yet. "Give me 20 minutes to call you back," he says. So on a bright, sunny day in the world's most important city, we can't play soccer because somebody forgot to pay the electric bill. See you guys tomorrow!
Third and final try: July 23/July 24 - Well I'm not sure if we got it right. I mean United looked terrible in a 2-0 home loss - snapping their 6 game unbeaten streak - but that's not even the half of it. We made it 53 minutes w/o any problems. Good tailgate. Great weather. And then the skies opened. Next thing you know its pitch black at RFK. Again. This is all happening at around 830ish. Yeah the next time we see soccer it is 1145 and there are about 200 people left in the stadium.
I, of course, stayed.
I mean what was I going to do? Go home and watch some Georgetown game from the mid 90's in a lame attempt to forget how freaking old I am??? Yeah not tonight boys. Tonight I was hanging out at RFK into the early morning hours to catch some of the worst soccer of my life.
So let's dig deeper for the positives:
1. I found the team store. I spent 100 bucks. Not bad considering the fact that I could have easily dropped 1000 bucks w/o flinching.
2. I still have a phone. My phone died a horrible death at the first United - Houston match. Something about texting in a downpour. Hey Verizon why don't you plan for such events. Idiots.
3. Mike Terry. I made the big mistake of saying that I could give him a ride back to the metro. What started out as a nightmare ended with a good highlight. This guy slides through my back window onto the bed of my truck in order to secure a gatorade from my cooler. It was really awesome to watch as the driver.
4. We cleaned the Pod. The state of conditions inside the Barra Brava pod at the beginning of the tailgate were really bleak. An hour later and it was spotless thanks mostly to Connie. That guy is a relentless worker. It's like he had the whole thing planned since the time he got up.
You know what's annoying? When people go out of town. OMG it's been forever!
You know what else is annoying? When the following people fake on a mid week United game: Baker, Yvonne, Sam, Bobby.
You know what's awesome. When people go out of town but have the presence of mind to send you 6 boxes of Banana Crunch. Silly!
Monday, July 14, 2008
i'm your huckleberry...
Why do they call it Miss Universe? I mean they don't even let other species from Earth enter the contest let alone intergalactic contestants. That has always bothered me and I'm not sure I've really ever put it out there for my fans. So there you have it.
Bam.
That's your Mom.
Best game of the day: Click here to play!
My best time so far is 7:21 remaining. The major complaint of the day with regards to this game has been that "I don't know all of the Big East schools". That's weird. How can you be sleeping on the best basketball conference in America???
WWJWD: Now normally I wouldn't give a rat's ass about a Wizards Summer League game but tonight is a little different. And by a little I mean a lot.
Jon Wallace.
My main man Jon Wallace is suiting up for the home team out in Vegas. I already miss Jon. Let's relive one of his many clutch performances right now.
Match-day 6: VIKA: So who wants some? So far I am only counting 4 guarantees for tonight's huge game in the KG Vets march into the playoffs. Bret is out. Hales is showing up late and/or drunk. Kaala got stuck in South Carolina. Mark is always a maybe. So yeah that leaves me, Jess, Baker, and Adam left to protect this house. Maybe Yvonne or Kary can be summoned for some fouls. (Did I mention that Yvonne is a great score keeper and a real asset to the KG Vets? If I didn't she might cry about it in the comments section.)
Tombstone: I am addicted to watching parts of this movie everyday. I think it came out in '93 and I just saw it for the first time ever in May. I'm in love with Val Kilmer's character - Doc Holliday. Silly
Bam.
That's your Mom.
Best game of the day: Click here to play!
My best time so far is 7:21 remaining. The major complaint of the day with regards to this game has been that "I don't know all of the Big East schools". That's weird. How can you be sleeping on the best basketball conference in America???
WWJWD: Now normally I wouldn't give a rat's ass about a Wizards Summer League game but tonight is a little different. And by a little I mean a lot.
Jon Wallace.
My main man Jon Wallace is suiting up for the home team out in Vegas. I already miss Jon. Let's relive one of his many clutch performances right now.
Match-day 6: VIKA: So who wants some? So far I am only counting 4 guarantees for tonight's huge game in the KG Vets march into the playoffs. Bret is out. Hales is showing up late and/or drunk. Kaala got stuck in South Carolina. Mark is always a maybe. So yeah that leaves me, Jess, Baker, and Adam left to protect this house. Maybe Yvonne or Kary can be summoned for some fouls. (Did I mention that Yvonne is a great score keeper and a real asset to the KG Vets? If I didn't she might cry about it in the comments section.)
Tombstone: I am addicted to watching parts of this movie everyday. I think it came out in '93 and I just saw it for the first time ever in May. I'm in love with Val Kilmer's character - Doc Holliday. Silly
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
choose the sword - and you will join me
What to do, what to do?
I mean there are so many things that have happened since the last time we came to you Live from the Park
Currently listening to: Cyco-Lic-No (Bitch Azz Niggaz) - Tha Dogg Pound. 1995 baby!
Ok so in an effort to actually crank something out today that doesn't take 8 hours to read, I will just touch on some recent developments.
Last night: I missed a United home(ish) game. There. I admit it. DC United played at the SoccerPlex in Germantown and I was a no show. Shame on me. As crazy as it might sound to an untrained ear, I had bigger fish to fry - KG Vets basketball in the Vienna League.
Matchday 5 - One on One Basketball.
Our nemesis over the past two seasons. Entering last night we were 0-4, including 2 playoff losses, against these jokers.
Currently listening to: While my Guitar Gently Weeps - The Beatles
So most of us actually got there a little bit early to talk about some slight changes we could make both offensively and defensively. The best part about the whole getting there early part is that Thoreau Middle has this axillary gym where we can usually just dick around in for hours before tipoff. Well not this time. The irony gods were having a good time as they picked yesterday as the day to rip up the floor. Thanks guys.
One of my favorite parts about yesterday was our decision to go zone to open up the game. We have kicked around the zone idea for awhile now but upon walking into the gym and seeing Brian Miller, I knew it was bad news. I told Jesse that the score would be 9 - nothing before we had a chance to breathe if we went zone. Well after some arguing seconds before the opening tip we decided to go zone.
Guess what happened?
Uh huh. 6 - 0 courtesy of two Miller bombs. Man that sounded familiar.
THANK YOU SIR MAY I HAVE ANOTHER!
Long story short we came back and beat their ass by a single point. That same single point that eluded us in the 2006 Championship game.
Pretty much everybody made big plays at one point or another. Jesse was hitting from half court with regularity. Baker had a sick tip in that he had no business making - bizarro Rasheed. Mark was blocking shots. Adam hit some timely mid range jumpers. Kaala was going to the hoop. Bret made some good passes - and didn't get ejected! Oh and me. I managed to get their entire team upset and bitching about me to the refs before the first tv timeout. (that is before the first dead ball with under 16:00 remaining to the basketball novices reading this junk).
I think that was their 3rd loss in like the last 8 seasons or so.
We were due.
We have a lot of work left to do but that was huge for our playoff chances. I kept saying all weekend that we were fine so it's nice to be right every now and then. Well maybe not right but I wasn't wrong. Is that the same?
We are seriously the only team in that league that can lose to garbage and beat the best. What does that mean? Ah hell who cares - Let's just play again next week and see what happens.
United: So we all know I missed the game. Well they were also playing a team in which they don't exactly beat with any sort of consistency when the loser goes home. I had Kary hitting me up with live updates but I was really dreading the inevitable bad news. I checked my phone and I had 21 messages that read like an AP wire update. (btw: she might have a future job calling) So by the time I got through all of them I realized that all of the stars aligned and the good guys won all across the board.
Sick.
Almost forgot. We were shaking hands before the tip-off and Miller asked me what was up with our record not being so good. I said hey what you see is what you get my man. He's a pretty nice guy but for about 80 minutes a year I really don't like him that much.
Ok well I gots to get going now brah. I'm not sure if my soccer stuff is even clean and there is a battle for promotion in the NVASA 2nd Division.
until we meet again....
latEr brah
I mean there are so many things that have happened since the last time we came to you Live from the Park
Currently listening to: Cyco-Lic-No (Bitch Azz Niggaz) - Tha Dogg Pound. 1995 baby!
Ok so in an effort to actually crank something out today that doesn't take 8 hours to read, I will just touch on some recent developments.
Last night: I missed a United home(ish) game. There. I admit it. DC United played at the SoccerPlex in Germantown and I was a no show. Shame on me. As crazy as it might sound to an untrained ear, I had bigger fish to fry - KG Vets basketball in the Vienna League.
Matchday 5 - One on One Basketball.
Our nemesis over the past two seasons. Entering last night we were 0-4, including 2 playoff losses, against these jokers.
Currently listening to: While my Guitar Gently Weeps - The Beatles
So most of us actually got there a little bit early to talk about some slight changes we could make both offensively and defensively. The best part about the whole getting there early part is that Thoreau Middle has this axillary gym where we can usually just dick around in for hours before tipoff. Well not this time. The irony gods were having a good time as they picked yesterday as the day to rip up the floor. Thanks guys.
One of my favorite parts about yesterday was our decision to go zone to open up the game. We have kicked around the zone idea for awhile now but upon walking into the gym and seeing Brian Miller, I knew it was bad news. I told Jesse that the score would be 9 - nothing before we had a chance to breathe if we went zone. Well after some arguing seconds before the opening tip we decided to go zone.
Guess what happened?
Uh huh. 6 - 0 courtesy of two Miller bombs. Man that sounded familiar.
THANK YOU SIR MAY I HAVE ANOTHER!
Long story short we came back and beat their ass by a single point. That same single point that eluded us in the 2006 Championship game.
Pretty much everybody made big plays at one point or another. Jesse was hitting from half court with regularity. Baker had a sick tip in that he had no business making - bizarro Rasheed. Mark was blocking shots. Adam hit some timely mid range jumpers. Kaala was going to the hoop. Bret made some good passes - and didn't get ejected! Oh and me. I managed to get their entire team upset and bitching about me to the refs before the first tv timeout. (that is before the first dead ball with under 16:00 remaining to the basketball novices reading this junk).
I think that was their 3rd loss in like the last 8 seasons or so.
We were due.
We have a lot of work left to do but that was huge for our playoff chances. I kept saying all weekend that we were fine so it's nice to be right every now and then. Well maybe not right but I wasn't wrong. Is that the same?
We are seriously the only team in that league that can lose to garbage and beat the best. What does that mean? Ah hell who cares - Let's just play again next week and see what happens.
United: So we all know I missed the game. Well they were also playing a team in which they don't exactly beat with any sort of consistency when the loser goes home. I had Kary hitting me up with live updates but I was really dreading the inevitable bad news. I checked my phone and I had 21 messages that read like an AP wire update. (btw: she might have a future job calling) So by the time I got through all of them I realized that all of the stars aligned and the good guys won all across the board.
Sick.
Almost forgot. We were shaking hands before the tip-off and Miller asked me what was up with our record not being so good. I said hey what you see is what you get my man. He's a pretty nice guy but for about 80 minutes a year I really don't like him that much.
Ok well I gots to get going now brah. I'm not sure if my soccer stuff is even clean and there is a battle for promotion in the NVASA 2nd Division.
until we meet again....
latEr brah
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