Can you hear me now?

I went about 3 weeks without a phone after my LG Chocolate systematically decided to retire at an early age.

I must say that it was a pretty sweet ride. The stops along the way included: randomly turning off, shutting down after being closed quickly, only working while charging, and then finally not even turning on while being plugged into a power outlet.

After realizing that I did need a phone from time to time, I went looking for help from my local Verizon store. After standing in line for about 20 minutes, I got some sketchy customer service advice by some kid dressed up in Goth. For whatever reason I decided to put a fair amount of stock for what he suggested. He said the buy a generic battery from RadioShack and I obliged.

So the battery showed up and my hopes were high. That didn't last long. I thought that I had beat the system by not extending my contract and only spending $23 on a battery. Upon putting the battery in my phone I was given a rather interesting screen that invoked confusion followed up closely by laughter:

USE GENUINE BATTERY. POWER OFF IN 10 - 9 - 8, etc, etc.

Major bummer for somebody that places a lot of emphasis on not being tied down to a 2 year contract.

I got a huge assist by a co-worker that gave me an older Verizon phone for free. All I had to do was get it activated for $15. Of course the full court press by the Verizon salesmen at the Clocktower store was pretty intense. Luckily I've got a special talent for ignoring people that suck.

The best part about this whole saga is that my old phone, that LG Chocolate I mentioned up at the top, is now working again. It's been on since Friday Night.

My best guess: The people at Verizon sent out a message for my phone to fail, forcing me into getting a new 2 year contract. Since I threw them for a loop, they panicked and just turned pumped a soul back into my old phone.

Thanks for nothing losers.